Nói chuyện với con gái về chuyện hẹn hò

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gợi mở các câu hỏi để con suy nghĩ: thích nhất bạn trai ở điểm gì? ghét nhất bạn trai ở điểm gì?...
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Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash.

Dear Dan,

My daughter started dating (hẹn hò) a lazy (lười biếng), dumb (ngu ngốc) guy. How can we tell her gently (nhẹ nhàng) that he is wrong for her without preaching (giảng đạo, lên lớp) to her, causing her to ignore (phớt lờ) us or go against our advice?
—Concerned Mother

It seems that you are experiencing the same reaction most mothers around the world have toward their daughters' boyfriends. Let's assume, for the sake of argument, that you are, in fact, correct, and that your daughter's new boyfriend really is dumb, lazy and up to no good. Nevertheless, don't tell your daughter your opinion (ý kiến) and instead ask her questions. Naturally, people tend not to ask themselves certain questions. But if someone else asks them, these questions get planted in their minds, and it is hard to keep from thinking about them. So thoughtful questions can make people think differently about what they want and how they view the world around them.

For example, you can ask, "How do you and your boyfriend get along? Do you ever fight? What do you love about him? What do you like less about him?" I admit it's a bit manipulative, but I hope it will get her to think about her relationship in more depth. And maybe she will reach the same conclusions you have.

Tags: marriage
Tags: parenting

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