Quy trình nó thế

chết rồi vẫn phải qua kiểm tra an ninh sân bay...
People cry at airports all the time. So when Jai Cooper heard sobbing (khóc tấm tức) from the back of the security line (hàng kiểm tra an ninh), it didn’t really faze (làm phiền, làm bối rối, làm lúng túng) her. As an officer of the Transportation Security Administration (TSA), she had gotten used to the strange behavior (hành động lạ thường) of passengers. Her job was to check people’s travel documents, not their emotional well-being.

But this particular group of tearful passengers presented her with a problem. One of them was in a wheelchair, bent over with her head between her knees, completely unresponsive (không phản ứng). “Is she okay? Can she sit up?” Cooper asked, taking their boarding passes and IDs to check. “I need to see her face to identify (xác định danh tính) her.”

“She can’t, she can’t, she can’t,” said the passenger who was pushing the wheelchair.

Soon, Cooper was joined at her station by a supervisor, followed by an assortment of EMTs and airport police officers. The passenger was dead. She and her family had arrived several hours prior, per the airport’s guidance for international flights, but she died sometime after check-in (chết sau khi check-in). Since they had her boarding pass in hand, the distraught family figured that they would still try to get her on the flight. Better that than leave her in a foreign country’s medical system (hệ thống y tế nước ngoài), they figured.

The family might not have known it, but they had run into one of air travel’s many gray areas. Without a formal death certificate (giấy chứng tử chính thức), the passenger could not be considered legally dead (về mặt luật pháp, chưa chết). And US law obligates airlines to accommodate their ticketed and checked-in passengers, even if they have “a physical or mental impairment that, on a permanent or temporary basis, substantially limits one or more major life activities.” In short: she could still fly. But not before her body got checked for contraband (buôn lậu, lậu thuế), weapons, or explosives. And since the TSA’s body scanners can only be used on people who can stand up, the corpse would have to be manually patted down.

“We’re just following TSA protocol,” Cooper explained.

Her colleagues checked the corpse according to the official pat-down process. With gloves on, they ran the palms of their hands over the collar, the abdomen, the inside of the waistband, and the lower legs. Then, they checked the body’s “sensitive areas” — the breasts, inner thighs, and buttocks — with “sufficient pressure to ensure detection.”

Only then was the corpse cleared to proceed into the secure part of the terminal.

Not even death can exempt you from TSA screening.

Tags: funny

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