2 lời khuyên cho buổi hẹn hò đầu tiên

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Dear Dan,

I’ve been corresponding with someone online, and we’re going to meet “in real life” for coffee. What’s the optimal length of time (khoảng thời gian tối ưu) for this first get together (lần đầu hẹn hò) ? Should I just wait and see how the conversation goes and take it from there?

—Justin

Most conversations probably last too long, not just awkward (lúng túng, ngượng nghịu, vụng về) dating ones: In a recent study, most people asked to recall their last conversation reported that they had wanted it to end sooner.

But if you arrange for a meeting with a potential romantic partner to be just 15 minutes, your date will read this as low interest. Conversely, if you block out five hours, you will suggest a different expectation (kỳ vọng). So what should you do?

Set the meeting for an hour, which is a good amount of time to form an initial impression (ấn tượng ban đầu). If things don’t seem to be going in the right direction, shift your goal. Start working on your conversational skills (kỹ năng trò chuyện): See if you can get the person to open up a bit more, to change their mind about something or to tell you a joke. Not all meetings need to be romantic. If you have more time than you need, try to make a different use of it.

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